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27-Jun-2020 11:40

Quite simply, intimacy that connectedness that arises when you feel truly bonded with your partner, and this can happen in the most practical of ways, New York–based relationship and etiquette expert and author April Masini tells Bustle.

"If you’re married, or you’ve been living together for some time, you should create an estate plan, or, simply, wills," she says. Also, this isn't just for preparing for the absolute worst, Masini says.

In fact, Martinez's question, "What is your fantasy? "This is a conversation you can have many times, checking in with them about their goals, aspirations and hopes," says Lindgren.

Just because you've had such a conversation once or twice doesn't mean the topic is closed.

So ask what your partner prefers — beforehand, when all is calm.

The topic of love came up, as it does, and we got to discussing how to get closer with our partners — specifically, what conversations build intimacy with a partner.

Tell your partner something that you've never revealed. If your partner doesn't reciprocate, you're totally allowed to query them.

"You can then ask them about the same subject in turn," says Ward.

Try mainlining some intimacy with a specific question, psychologist Nikki Martinez tells Bustle.

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Martinez has one question in mind: "What is your fantasy?"What this means is that while your partner is in your life, you want to be a good host to them, helping them to achieve their goals and dreams, rather than focusing on what you want from them."Eschewing selfishness as a route to intimacy: Yes to that.



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